The Small Cat series
by Lili Blue
Summary: Mulder and Scully through the eyes of a Small One.


The Small Cat I by Lili Blue Date: October 1998 Category: S; H & R Rating: PG Keywords: Mulder/Scully UST 

Spoilers: None. Could be situated at anytime in Mulder and Scully's partnership, presumably post season 4. 

Archive: Archive anywhere, as long as you keep my name attached. Please let me know. 

Summary: Mulder and Scully through the eyes of a Small One. 

Dedication: To Barnaby, the yellow cat. And to Laura and Mike, with love. 

Disclaimer: Fox Mulder and Dana Scully are the property of The Master Chris Carter, 1013 Productions, Fox Television, as well as writers and actors. No infringement is intended. 

Feedback: Please, feel free to drop me a line. Nice comments and even flames will be appreciated. I believe in constructive criticism and I'm very open to any suggestions. Write me at: bluespooky@wanadoo.fr or http://members.tripod.com/~LiliBlue/. 

Comments: I hope I didn't misinterpreted cats' behavior here, I don't own a cat, never have and never will (sigh), I'm allergic to their fur. But I love them dearly. 

*** *** 

The Small Cat I by Lili Blue 

It scratches. It always does so. Everywhere. 

I'm hungry. I need something solid to put in my grumbling stomach. 

I sniff here and there. Just garbage. 

Then, I see him. He's a member of the Big Ones. A big Cat. A male from the look of it. He must smell delicious. Water runs on his body. He was running. Lots of skin to see and thick chocolate fur - I love to lick chocolate when they let me - on the top of his head. That'll do. 

I run in his lowerlegs. He stops, startled, out of breath. 

"Hey you, what'cha doin'?". 

His mouth opens and closes but he's a Big One and I don't understand them. None of the other Small Cats I know are able to understand them. 

So I do what I do best, I purr and mew and rub my creamy belly against his legs. My thick fur brushes against the soft furs of his legs. He is indeed warm and wet. 

"Wow, what do you want, kitty?" 

I purr again, louder, and put my paw on his lowerpaw as we call it. It's thick and it's smells bad from the silly coverings the Big Ones put on. Why do they need them anyway? 

"You hungry?" 

I don't know what you're mewing about but I need FOOOD!!! 

"Okay, come on." 

Oops! And he lifts me up with his upperpaw. Like my Mommy did when I was little. But she used her mouth to carry me around instead. He holds me against his upperbody and I purr against the soft, wet material he wears above his warm skin. Cat's Heaven? 

*** *** 

He brought me back to some place. Probably his own territory, everything smells like him in here. And I don't sense or smell or hear another Small Cat here. Great! 

He pours me some milk in a small cup. Milk? Yuck! Doesn't he know that, we, Small Ones, only drink milk when we're Kittens? And lose the taste for it afterwards? This Big One doesn't know much about us. 

He realizes I'm not interested as I totally ignore the cup. 

"Okay. I'll be right back." 

And suddenly, he's not there anymore. I don't like that very much. But the whole place smells like him and it's good. I sneak around, climbing up on big cold squares - a gray Small One told me it's called furniture. 

There is a luminous tank near the see-outside pan. Some Old Small Ones called that a window, I don't know where they got that idea from. Mommy told me the Swimming Ones live in tanks but I doubt that. I've seen them, they are mashed and brown and come right out of a can. Those are bright like the shiny ball outside in the sky and float in water like the Flying Ones in the air. Could they be Swimming Ones? Mommy never lied to me. She showed me the Flying Ones in the trees but they're too high to get. Those Swimming Ones look more and more edible to me. 

Then, I discover happiness in the form of a big, dark-as-night piece of soft skin. It's impregnated with the Big One musky smell, a very thick and bitter smell of him. I love this place. 

A moment and he's back. I don't bother turning towards him, I'm too busy stretching myself and rubbing my hips and belly on the soft material. 

"Hey, Cat, come over here!" 

By the noise he made, I believe he addressed himself to me. 

"Good thing Mrs. Dudley always keeps extra cans of cat food, eh?" 

I jump up next to him, near the wide gray hole where the water disappears. Another mystery of the Big Ones. Where does the water go? 

I smell FOOD!!! He's opening a gray can of real food! I smell Swimming Ones and orange vegetable. Not my favorite but I'm not about to complain now. 

He puts the food in a plate, then lowers it on the floor. Why they always want us to eat on the floor, I don't know. But I do know the taste feels good on my palate and will soon fill my stomach. 

"Good kitty." 

He strokes my head with his upperpaw. It distracts me, I don't like it but he's gone before I can mew a protest. 

I hear water running. A Small One once told me the Big Ones love water. Makes me wonder if they are *real* Cats. But what else could they be? 

*** *** 

A moment after, I'm done with the food and I fall asleep on the big black furniture. 

The Big One wakes me up. The water has stopped. He sits near me, a piece of white stuff covering his lower body. The Big Ones always have many layers of material above their skin; I guess they must be cold because their fur is so thin. But this Big One only wears a tiny layer. Drops of water roll on his chest. He smells bad, like the colorful fruits the Big Ones enjoy so much. Not like he did before. I could sneeze. 

He tries to touch my head again so I move to him, and I climb on his lower body, the part that's flat now that he is sitting. I nestled my entire body on him and purr again. I know Big Ones love when we do that. I have to admit it's pleasurable. 

He gently strokes my body, the long extremities of his upperpaws travel on me and go deep in my fur. I love this Big One. 

Then he moves his paw away from my warmth and I could scratch him for it. He reaches a tiny black thingy. And utters gibberish in it. 

"Hey, Scully, it's me." 

"Guess what?" 

"No! But I'd like to, though..." 

Obviously, he's not interested in me anymore. 

"I have a kitty." 

"NO! Not *that* kind of kitty! Scully, what are you wearing?" 

"Seriously, he is beige and seems to be fairly young. I found it today when I went out jogging." 

He paused. 

"No, I didn't steal if from some innocent little girl in the park. He actually came to me!" 

"I didn't say that!" 

He emits a sound and I can see his teeth. Usually, when I see a Small Cat's teeth, it a bad sign. A storm is coming. But the Big Ones show their teeth when they're happy. They really are different from us. I wonder if it is another Big One that makes mine happy. 

"You're right, I didn't check. Hold on." 

And he suddenly rolls me on my back, examining my lower belly. It tickles and I let him do whatever pleases him. 

"Scully, it's a girl." 

"You know what I mean, a female...what's with you today?" 

He shows teeth again. But he stopped touching me and I miss it. I protest and begin to push my paws against his very own belly, like I used to do with my Mommy. 

"Scully, I think she's trying to milk me." 

His tummy is soft and I can't stop myself until he brushes away my good intentions with his paw. 

"Alright, I'll make us some coffee and we'll order a pizza. Sure." 

And then he puts the black object away. I wish I knew all the words for the Big Ones' enigmatic objects; we, Small Ones don't have words for things we don't use. 

He moves me away from him, puts me back on the furniture and raises to go to another room. I follow him, always curious about the Big Ones' habits. 

He lets me stay there and there is a bed! I know that word because it's one of our favorite places. I jump on it but I'm soon disappointed, this bed doesn't smell like him at all. I thought all Big Ones had to rest, like us. Nevertheless, I lay there and watch him cover his beautiful, almost fur-less body with thin layers of soft material. Cloth, I think. 

His lowerpaws seem strong and his lowerlegs are thin and sinewy. Just like mine. His ass is round and I realize his tail is in front. Poor thing. The Big Ones are totally inadequate creatures. No practical sense at all. 

His upperlegs and paws are gracious and his head is well shaped, for a Big One, that is. His muzzle is big and I bet he has the best sense of smell you can dream of. He doesn't have whiskers and that puzzles me. Some Big Ones have whiskers. I saw them. How does my Big One find his way without his whiskers? 

His eyes are almost like the leaves outside. 

Overall, my Big One is an amazing Cat. 

*** *** 

Later, there is a sound and he goes to open the door. A Big One enters, a female from what it seems. 

Her fur is longer than his and is the color of the flames. Her eyes are sky-like. 

"Hey, Mulder." 

She shows her teeth to my Big One and he does it back. 

"Hi, Scully, come on in." 

She comes in, she is very gracious. 

I hate her already. 

She sees me and comes to me. Back off, Big One! 

"You very nice little kitty..." 

Don't you dare touch me! There she is, rubbing her paw on my back and I glance at my Big One. He seems happy so I pretend to like it. Bitch. 

"Mulder, she's adorable." 

"Here, let me take your jacket. Yes, she's quite a lovable cat." 

"Thanks. What are you going to name her?" 

They move in the food storage area. 

"I'm not. I'm not keeping her." 

"Why?" 

I follow them and mew. But he only has eyes for HER. 

"What will I do with a cat, Scully? We're always on the road, how's that poor thing going to survive?" 

"You could share her care with your nice neighbor, the old cat lady." 

"She already lent me some food." 

"See?" 

"Scully..." 

More and more incomprehensible sounds. He doesn't care about me anymore, now that his Big One is here. Touch me, I'm here!! I rub against his leg. 

"Do I look like a cat person?" 

"You could use some company." 

"I've been telling you that for years..." 

The Big female utters a happy sound and she picks me up to the level of her muzzle. PUT ME DOWN!!!! I struggle in her paws, almost roar my discontent so she lets her grip go and I jump away from her, only to land near my Big One. Try again and we'll fight, Big One! I'm not afraid of you! 

"Looks like she doesn't appreciate you very much, Scully..." 

I'm sure he is warning her to leave me alone. She looks at him and isn't convinced. 

"She must be jealous..." 

"Sure, Mulder." 

My Big One picks me up - see, I knew it - and we all go in the room with the big soft black furniture. The Big female sits there with him and I'm again sprawled on his lower body. Is she comes to sit on him, I'll bite her. 

My Big One runs his paw's extremities on me again. With his other paw, he holds a cup and laps at his black water. So does she. 

"I'm glad Skinner let us take some days off." 

She closes her eyes and remains quiet. Good because I don't like the sounds she makes. Gee, now she makes noises in her sleep! Oh, she opened her eyes again. 

"This last case exhausted the hell out of us, Mulder. Skinner was good enough to recognize you needed some off time to gather yourself before going back to all this nonsense." 

Lots and lots of sounds. My Big One seems captivated by the female. I hate her. 

"'I' needed time off? We both did, Scully." 

She seems annoyed and I'm sure he told her that he will never leave me and she can go back to be an alley cat and live in some gutter, away from the coziness of our home. My home is where my Big One lives, right? 

"Do you really think what we do is nonsense?" 

There, he rubs my back with his paw again. I purr, make my body heavy and try to create as much warmth as I can to try to please him. I slowly lick imaginary dust from my paws and my legs. 

"We are NOT nonsensical, Mulder. I still believe we are helping people. And helping ourselves by cauterizing our personal wounds in the process. What I meant is that the world out there is full of nonsense and that, hopefully, we are here to straighten things." 

"My, Agent Scully...having such a high opinion of your mission in life..." 

"Stop it, you know what I mean..." 

"I do...I do..." 

He leans towards her and holds her paw, slowing rubbing his extremities on her skin. I thought that was reserved for my enjoyment only. 

*** *** 

They go on addressing to each other in their mysterious language for a while, then the food comes by the door. Miracle of the Big Ones, food always appears like out of nowhere. 

It smells horrible, even the cheese does, so I let them eat their warm, red triangles. 

When they're done, they don't clean their paws off like we do, by licking them, but they wipe them out on small pieces of cloth. I learn a lot from watching them. 

Then I get bored. 

HERE!!! I'M HERE!!! They are so absorbed in themselves that I don't seem to be part of the pack anymore. I wonder what I could do to regain my Big One's attention. 

I observe them. Are they going to mate tonight? My Mommy warned me about Small Male Cats. When they come near you and declare you things and touch your body and paws, they want to mate with you. Seeing the two Big Ones together, I'm sure they are upon mating. 

I gaze at the female and notice the round mounds of her upperbody. I saw a Big Mommy in a park once and deduced those are used to feed their Kittens. They are huge and so unlike mine. But I don't care because I have so many of them and she doesn't seem to have more than two. My Big One definitely cannot tolerate that. 

They put their cups down on some low flat piece of furniture and she snuggles against him, crushing my tail in the process. MEOW! 

Here, she moves a little aside but she is still safe in his upperlegs, leaning against his upperbody. She doesn't purr but her mouth lets a tiny breathing sound escape. That doesn't please me at all. I mew again but my Big One is oblivious of me. 

So I leave him. He can be cold, I don't care. He is as nice as a Barking One when his Big One is around. Brrh, I shiver at the memory of the big black Barking One that chased me last week. 

I wander in the food storage place, but my plate is empty. I lurk toward the tank. Too much job, too much water. There is just one thing to do, go back in there and put my claims on MY Big One. 

I see them, their paws entwined, their heads close, their muzzles almost brushing. Her eyes are closed but he is staring at her. 

This is wrong. Dangerous. 

So I rush to them at the exact moment their muzzles are going to touch and I loudly jump on my Big One, causing them to startle and back off from each other. I am a genius!! 

The Big female hides her head in her paws but my Big One doesn't react the way I thought he would... 

He grabs me, my body in his large paws, my four legs dangling in the air... 

"What do you think you're doing, you?" 

He breathes in my ear: "You suck, kitty." 

The Big female let out small bitter-happy sounds. They look at each other and theirs lips slightly curve upwards. 

I have no idea what's going on. 

"I think I know how you could call her, Mulder." 

He looks at her, obviously very interested in what she has to deliver. 

"B.T." 

"B.T?" 

Bee-tea? 

"Bad Timing." 

He makes a loud happy sound and she seems content too. He looks at me straight in the eye. 

"B.T. it is." 

I still don't understand him, though he tries hard to talk in my face. 

I mew and he puts me back on the floor. I right away leaps back on him and he strokes my back and flank. She does so too and their paws meet and play in my fur. 

She has a nice way of rubbing my inner thigh. 

I might get used to her after all... 

THE END 

*** *** 

Should I leave it at that or go on with more adventures of B.T. Mulder? Tell me if it's worth the work. 

***************** 

The Small Cat II By Lili Blue Date: October 1998 Category: S; H & MSR Rating: PG-13 Keywords: Mulder/Scully UST 

Spoilers: None. 

Archive: Archive anywhere, as long as you keep my name attached. Please let me know. 

Summary: The new adventures of Mulder's cat Bad Timing (aka B.T.). 

Dedication: For Sophie and Diane. And thanks to Leah for her help. 

Disclaimer: Fox Mulder and Dana Scully are the property of The Master Chris Carter, 1013 Productions, Fox Television, as well as writers and actors. No infringement is intended. 

Feedback: Please, feel free to drop me a line. Nice comments and even flames will be appreciated. I believe in constructive criticism and I'm very open to any suggestions. 

Comments: It would help to have read "The Small Cat I", just so you know how Mulder got a cat and get used to the POV. 

*** *** 

The Small Cat II (1/1) by Lili Blue 

It's been quite a number of darks and lights since I've started living with my Big One. 

He almost never sleeps but I do. Better now than before, since his paws always stroke my belly while I doze. His warmth is necessary to my well-being and I claim it as much as I can. Fortunately, my Big One demonstrates many skills in...many things. 

He doesn't really prepare food but always has something I can snack on. There is always some water left for me, as well as my favorite soft piece of cloth, the one that smells like him and he lets me sleep in. 

We play a lot; he chases me and I feign to be offended by his pursuit, so when he grabs me, I can rub against him endlessly and he never complains. 

The Swimming Ones in the tank died and he didn't replace them. They were poor company but at least, I had something to contemplate catching during the day. Because my Big One is almost always outside. He never allows me to go out but I don't miss the fresh air as much as I relish the warmth of his place. 

Once, he left a window open and I could have sneaked out and explored but I was scared. Mean Small Ones might be out there. And Barking Ones too. My Big One keeps me safe. 

Several times since I've been here, he left me alone. For many darks passing. An old Big One came to feed me, and clean the corner of tiny pebbles where I...hum… this is embarrassing... pee. I had this crazy thought that Big Ones actually were inferior to us because they have to clean up our mess. Then again, we Small Ones don't seem as free as they are. 

I dread when he's gone. Because I know he is with HIS Big One. He smells like her afterwards. Here is my theory: he wants to mate with her all the time so he takes her away some place where I'm not. I don't like that at all. 

I've been waiting for him today, stretching and carelessly forgetting some fur in his bed as I twisted the cloth and slept inside. 

It's dark outside and he is still not with me. Suddenly, the front door opens and there he is. He looks bad, his fur is tousled and his eyes sleepy. His Big One wore him out. Bitch. 

"Hey B.T., kitty? Come here!" 

I think that's his way of telling me he wants me. That "bee-tea" thing. He always calls it hard in my face as if I could understand what he utters. Well, I can't. I wonder if he calls his Big One "bee-tea" too. 

Fortunately, the flame-headed Big One isn't with him. But I still pout and totally ignore his presence. 

"Yeah, I know it's late. But I drove all the way down from Philly today so I think I'm entitled to be grouchy, alright?" 

He groans at me. Ah! He doesn't seem happy. The female wasn't in the mood. My mommy told me that if you refuse to mate with a male, they'll get mad and some can be dangerous. That's why I carefully avoided the problem. Until now. I know Big Ones don't mate with Small Ones, but still. I don't like the idea that he will have kitties with another female. 

My Big One is now fixing me a fresh meal and I have to make amends. So I go to him and rub against his lowerpaws. My soft tail circles him and there: he's mine. He grabs me swiftly and hugs me against his chest, smoothing my fur with his large paws. I purr. What else is there to do? 

Then water falls from the sky. Like when the clouds dance outside. But smaller. I look up at his face and notice that the rain comes from his eyes. Rolling down his muzzle and his mouth only to fall down on my belly. 

"She doesn't know…how much it affects me too…" 

There he is, confessing his gibberish to me. I DON'T UNDERSTAND YOU!!! But he always has a lot to utter to me. We sit down on his big black piece of furniture and as he keeps me close to him, I can hear soft poundings coming from his chest. The sounds slowly lull me to sleep, and he goes on rambling. 

"See, I thought I might have this too… Children of my own. Someday. It's not like I can anymore." 

Hey?! One drop has fallen into my eye and startled me awake. I put one paw on his thigh, silently begging him to be still and stop pouring like that. He scares me. 

"Oh, B.T. kitty, you don't know how lucky you are… You have no worries…your days are so simple…" 

I just want to sleep! Stop the noise! And that high-pitched noise again, I know it's her. 

He shifts to get to the black object, I uncomfortably fall off him and he ignores me. Like always when she's involved. I meow out my discontent. 

"Mulder." 

"Uh-huh… Right….Sure…I'll see you tomorrow then." 

That's it? He woke me up for this? I gladly rejoiced that he doesn't seem to be happier than before. So the female didn't mate with him! Ah! 

I could bite my raspy tongue. I should wish nothing but happiness for my Big One, since he gives me plenty of warmth, protection and food. I climb back on him and he resumes stroking my backbone again. There! There! RRRGH! Exquisite. I value his long paws more than anything. Even more than the brown food with the green stuff in it. It must mean something. 

He lies down and I lie along him, my entire back against his tummy, my tail flopping idly. 

*** *** 

His eyes are mostly cloudy and rainy these days. I wonder if the female Big One realizes that she hurts him. 

He pays less and less attention to me; he left the window open several times lately. 

Just to show him that I don't care, that I'm growing up - which I am, thank you very much - I venture myself out of his lair. 

Chill stings me but I go on. My belly tightens and I feel like meeting others, you know, just so we could share our experiences with our Big Ones and I could brag about mine. How beautiful he is…his delicious bitter odor when he's hot… 

I carefully ease myself down the big block of stone we live in. It has been a while since I've done that type of exercise. 

The alley is nice, full of green-leaves and various smells. 

I hear an inviting meow and, hum, there is that large Small Cat, brown with yellow stripes on his side. His long paws are strong and his eyes yellow like the sun. Not bad… 

From what he says, he is interested in sharing a Squeaky One of his possession. Yuck! A Squeaky One? With their short paws, long teeth and tail, they're repulsive. Not a chance. MY Big One feeds me better than this. 

Of course, this wasn't the thing to say and he's upset. But still he comes nearer, sneaking around me, sniffing me and I pretend to be extremely offended by all this. I meow deeply as his sniffing goes…more intimate. 

I sit straight on my tail, playing hard to get and his eyes flash like lightning. My belly is all funny. 

I realize this is it, I will fully become a Cat if this happens. Mommy, hear me? I'm upon mating! 

There it is, oh! He's on my back, he bites my fur and… 

"Hey! Get off her!" 

I swirl into the air and without knowing what happened, I'm in my Big One's embrace. I struggle to look down and see what happened to MY Small One. 

"Go away, you horny cat! She's still a kitty!" 

My Big One almost kicks away the Cat with his lower paw and I feel like crushing my teeth in his upperpaw in revenge. Why in the name of the Mother of all Cats did he do that? 

In a few swift moves, we're back at our place. 

"B.T…." He shakes his head from side to side. He makes me sick. "You scared me there…" 

He finally lets go of me and I jump away, as far as I can from him. WHY DID YOU DO THAT?? You have your share of it with…her! And why were you here? You usually leave me for so long… 

I'm furious, my hair is up on my spine and I spit. 

"B.T.? My, but you seem angry at me? Guess I'm not the only one frustrated around here…" 

He comes near me and one look into his hazel depths convinces me that he still owns me. Alright… 

I forget my anger and rush to his warmth. He sits down on the floor with me and when I jump on him, he lies still and I sprawl my entire body on his. I don't know what mating is - yet- but this surely is better. 

We fall asleep. 

*** **** 

Oh, I hate those noises. Noises all the time. Rumble at the door. 

Suddenly, my eyes pop open and there she is, HIS Big One. She has a funny expression on her face, like contentment and sadness. 

She lowers down and then her paws are on my Big One! 

"Mulder…Mulder, wake up." 

She caresses his fur and his jaw. My claws sharpen. His eyes flutter open. 

"Scully?" 

"Hey, partner, you weren't answering you door." 

"Yeah, I guess B.T. and I took a little nap here." 

"On the floor." 

He looks at her like a kitten who has just snatched food away from his mother. 

"Well, yes." 

She extends a paw to him. 

"Come on." 

He links his paw to hers and that's it, I'm forgotten. 

*** *** 

I don't want to know. I don't want to see them. 

So I sit outside, my body numb by the cold. I could see them by the see-through pan if I turned around but I don't want to. 

She must be all over him again. 

So I just stay there and contemplate the night and the Flying Ones in the trees. 

And of course, they're right there, behind me. I could just glance. 

That idiot in the tree makes sharp sounds. It's too dark for that. Somebody should tell him. 

So I just rush inside to see what she's doing to him. 

It's quiet. Then I hear a ruffle noise coming from the room where the bed he never sleeps in is. 

I cautiously enter and…oh, Oh, OH!! 

Here they are. 

I can see all of their fur and no cloth. He is on his back and she leans on him. His tail is very…agitated and her mouth very…busy. They smell bitter and musky. 

His head rolls and I can see his eyes are cloudy again. 

"Aaaah, Scully… I…" 

"Shut up, Mulder." 

My blood boils. 

"Scully!" 

His face is stiff. He stopped their mating and now he cups her face in his paws. Their nuzzles almost touch. 

"I wish…I could give you this. You would be the most wonderful mother." 

He strokes her belly with one paw now. I'm transfixed. 

"This is all I can offer." 

"You talk too much." Her voice is rough but her eyes soft. Maybe she just told him she wants him to stop. 

"Uuuuh…" 

Obviously not. 

She is conscientiously licking his body, blowing on the light furs here and there. Like when I clean my paws. His eyes are closed and he groans like my hungry stomach. 

Her breasts sway freely and they seem heavy unlike mine. I wonder if she just fed her kittens. And oh, she has fur down there too. But no tail. Incomplete creature. Weird and fascinating Big One indeed. 

"Mulder…? Mulder? Why did you…stop?" 

I was so engrossed in detailing the strange features of the female that I didn't notice the intense stare of my Big One. 

"We have an audience." 

"What?" 

His eyes are on me, interrogating, amused and…some other thing I can't put my paw on. Her gaze follows his and…busted! 

"Oh, B.T…." 

He nods to me then. 

"B.T., shoo… Go away…" 

I want to see more! Why did they stop? It was quite…something. If I had friends among the Small Cats, I would tell them about it. 

"B.T.!" He's out of breath. 

HEY! He just threw a soft, fluffy piece of cloth at me. The one that smells like him and hair from the Flying Ones. What is this supposed to mean? 

"Bad Timing Mulder, GET OUT!" 

She has his belly covered with her long fur and emits small, silly noi ses because her muzzle is deep in him. 

"Oh, you'll see who giggles now!" 

"Ah!" 

And they're all over each other again. Alright, alright. I can see when I'm not wanted. 

I exit the place, jump on the black furniture and start licking my thigh. 

I wonder if they're gonna have a nice litter of kitten from this mating. And if I'll get to play with them. That could be fun!!! 

FIN 

*** *** 

Do you think B.T. will ever get lucky?? ************************ 

The Small Cat III By Lili Blue 

Date: February 1999 Category: S; H & MSR Rating: PG Keywords: Mulder/Scully Romance 

Spoilers: None. 

Archive: Archive anywhere, as long as you keep my name attached. Please let me know. 

Summary: Mulder's cat, B.T. (Bad Timing), introduces new Small Ones in the Mulder family. 

Dedication: This one's for Melissa. Thanks for her help, support and constant kick in the b**t to remind me I do have to write about the darn Cat... Thanks to Leah for editing. 

Disclaimer: You know, CC, 1013 and so on…not me... yada...yada... 

Feedback: Please, feel free to drop me a line. Nice comments and even flames will be appreciated. I believe in constructive criticism and I'm very open to any suggestions. 

Comments: It would help to have read "The Small Cat" I & II, just so you know how Mulder got a cat and get used to the POV. You can find them on my Web Site or request them by email. 

*** *** 

I haven't seen them. Their kittens. They mate a lot, my Big One and his female. But there are no sign of kittens. Her belly hasn't swelled yet. 

It is indeed strange. My mom told me once they've mated with you, 

you can consider yourself a mommy. You are fairly sure to have kitties afterwards. The Big female is really different, I guess. 

I observe them all day long and they seem happy. Most of the time. But my Big One is sad and bored when his female is not with 

him. And I hate him for it. 

I'm not enough. Sure, he likes me. He caresses my fur and throws me a ball to play with once in a while. But I realize that I do not make my Big One happy the way she does. 

And I am not sure my Big One makes me happy anymore. 

*** *** 

"She won't bite, Scully. I know she doesn't like you very much but…please?" 

He exits the place where the water runs all the time and I meow that I'm here and satisfied by his presence. I enjoy him better when he's wet. But he barely brushes my back with his paws and resumes his talking. 

"I can't take her with me there! I'm flying. My mom is allergic to cats. My neighbor is in Florida…Come on, it'll be just for two 

days… I promise I'll be *good* to you afterwards…" 

His voice is low and throaty so I assume he is talking to his Big 

One, through some kind of mysterious device. That's how he addresses himself to her most of the time. I never understand what he says but she seems to enjoy it. 

"Okay. See you then." 

I jump on his bed, the nest he rarely uses, and look at him hard. 

He looks right back at me while he puts on layers of cloth that cover his almost furless body. 

"We're going for a ride." 

I hate that tone. He smiles but does not show teeth and this isn't good. Usually, he uses this to convince me to do something I don't want to do. Like the day he made me eat that horrible food coming from a repugnant, smelly can. It wasn't tasty like the one flavored of Swimming Ones and peas. It was downright awful and I was mad at him for a long, long time. 

I close my eyes and try to forget I'm about to endure a new "stinky can" experience. I lie above his cloth on his bed, imprinting my smell on them. He is quiet and I purr softly, lulling myself to sleep. 

WOW! What was that? 

My body was lifted in the air. I was just snatched away from the warmth of my cocoon by my Big One's powerful paws. He hugs me to his chest and goes to the other end of his lair. I can't see a thing because my head rests heavily against him but it seems that 

we are moving around. 

Oh. Oh. We're out now. He has actually NEVER voluntarily taken me 

outside before. Because of one unfortunate episode that happened once. Not my fault if that Small One couldn't resist my cream colored fur and wanted to mate. My Big One was kind of furious after that and he never left any window open anymore. There went my social life. 

And now he digs in the cloth to retrieve some gray things that, I've learned, are used by Big Ones to open their ways anywhere. Today, they open one huge, shiny piece of cold material. 

I've seen those before. Big Ones sit inside of them and move. Fast. Faster that I did when that Barking One chased me. Brrr. I still can't get over that. 

Anyway, I stir in protest and my Big One puts me down on the soft 

fur that covers the inside of the moving object. Truly amazing. It has see-through panes, much like the windows at home. 

My Big One sits on the other side and inserts one of the gray things in a tiny hole and, suddenly, the whole ensemble shudders in a terrible roar. Oh! I'm scared now and I jump on my Big One's 

lap. One paw brushes me away and he jerks me back where I was. 

"Don't be scared, B.T., we're only going to see Scully." 

Sure, whatever you say. But I'm afraid and now we're moving - I can feel it - but my paws rest and my lowerlegs aren't even slightly agitated! As I have no idea about where we're going, I resume my exploration of the thing. The lights and shadows change 

often and I can see trees and bits of sky through the window. Amazing thing, indeed. 

*** *** 

"Yeah, thanks, Scully. I don't know how I could manage without you." 

"You'd be dead, G-man…" 

I wake from a nap, open my eyes and I see her. Yuck. Wait?! He brought me to her lair? I stir in my Big One's paws and he lets me go. The place looks huge, bigger than my home and smells…well, 

not so bad. 

"See, she already feels at home…" 

"I bet ya she's going to pee in my bedroom and scratch at my curtains once you're gone…" 

I turn to them just to see my Big One force his mouth on his mate's. Great. It's long, wet and noisy. I've learned my lesson. 

"MEOW!" and I jump on a big piece of furniture with little flowers on it. But they don't smell anything like the ones outside. 

This always works. Each and every time. They break apart and the female seems alarmed. I can see it in her eyes. 

"Told you…" 

"B.T., get down." 

My Big One's voice is harsh and I don't give a Squeaky One's ass. 

Claw for a claw. 

"B.T… be nice." 

I stare at him and dig my claws in the material beneath me. That'll teach him. 

"Bad Timing Mulder!" 

Oops. The female rolls her eyes in a very ungracious manner and my Big One steps towards me. He picks me up and of course, he talks to me a lot, like he always does. If only he spoke Small Cat's speech, I'll tell him to dump his ugly mate and keep me forever. But that is not going to happen anytime soon. Especially 

not right now. 

"B.T., you're gonna stay with Scully for two days. I want you to behave and be nice to her. What am I doing, she's a cat. Jesus…" 

The female laughs softly. She is right behind him. Suddenly, he shoves me into her paws, against her chest and I'm suppose to remain there? She seems as startled as I am. 

"It's time you two do some female bonding." 

I'm too paralyzed to even think of moving. He kisses his mate on the muzzle and goes away. 

"I have to catch that flight. I'll call you." 

"You owe me BIG TIME, Mulder." She doesn't sound too happy. 

"Yes, well, punish me when I get back, okay?" 

"Bye, G-man." 

"G-woman." 

And he's gone. He's coming back soon, right? Not like when he leaves for three days and lets me be fed by this old Big female One that smells of another Small One. She isn't mean but she's not Him. And then he comes back all scratchy and stinky and he goes right back to sleep. 

"What am I going to do with you?" she says… 

Put me down! It worked because she does lower me to the floor. Hey, maybe she speaks like me? 

"Meow, meow, meeeew!!" 

"So what is it now, kitty?" 

Her puzzled expression confirms my doubts. She has no clue as to what I'm talking about. Excellent. 

"Meow, MEOW!!!" 

I jump on a wooden thingie next to the window. 

"Meow, meeee, meow!" 

"So what?" She comes closer to me as I sit down and stare outside. Nice, full of trees and Flying Ones. The sun shines. 

She pats my head with her paw, and, damn, I like it. 

"You're gonna miss him too? Well, I am. He'll be back soon. Don't 

you worry, kitty, I'll take good care of you." 

All I know is that I'm gonna miss my Big One a great deal. But at 

least, I know he won't mate with the female if I'm here to keep an eye on her! 

*** *** 

The snooping around the sun-headed Big One's lair isn't that rewarding. It's so tidy and bright. Annoying. 

Plenty of things to scratch and pull at though. But I doubt that would make my Big One too happy. 

The female fed me well. A lot more than my Big One, I have to give her that. There's a look on her face that might mean she's afraid I would claw her if she stopped pouring the deliciously smelling mix. Oh, well, not like I'm doing it on purpose, right? 

She left today. She came back later, and seemed amazed at me. True, I didn't break anything and I peed on the little stones that are left for me in the ground of the food-storage place. 

She rubbed my back and belly in gratitude. Amazing One. 

*** *** 

Then, the sun was high and it was bright outside again. She left again. I resumed to my wandering around the place and discovered that if you push hard enough with your muzzle or you paw, the small window of the place where the waters always runs, you can see outside. 

I love that. 

In fact, you can actually go outside. I remember rather vividly what happened - or should I say, almost happened - to me last time I sneaked outside of my Big One's lair. 

Oh, guess what? 

I want that to happen again. 

*** *** 

So her street is way nicer than the ones I previously frequented. 

It's clean and bright and that's horrible because you can't smell 

food nor see Squeaky Ones. It's pretty out there but the Flying Ones are way too silent. 

I am so bored… 

The fire sun is way above my head. 

I wander along numerous pavements and all I can see are Young Big 

Ones strolling around, wandering aimlessly. They can be so clueless sometimes. They walk alone or in pairs and they never seem to get anywhere. They just walk, and walk. 

I find a little square location where the ground smells of wet leaves and Barking Ones pooh. Once I forget about the horrible stink, the place is rather nice. 

I do some investigating over the ground. See, I must know what's going on there. 

Leaves, branches and tiny Crawling Ones tickle my muzzle. One bold black creature with many legs dares to get stuck in my whiskers. I shake my head hard until I feel woozy and the poor thing probably flew all the way down the street I came from. 

You'd better not mess with me. 

In the end, I find a nice flat wood seat where Big Ones usually sit. I lie there and let sleep come and take me away. 

I wish I had kitties. I would share this quietness with them because I know my Big One wouldn't take them away from me. It's time. 

*** *** 

Oh, wonderful. Now water is coming from the sky. Heavy. 

I run as fast as I can and don't ask me how but I arrive right in 

front of the female One's block of stone. Where her lair is. I can smell it. Actually I think I can smell everything with that never-ending rain. 

So now, like the idiot Small Cat I am, I sit in front of the big passage that leads to her place. All this because the window is now closed. Well, I'm good at opening things… when they open. 

I wait. 

Sneeze. 

Wait again. 

I look up to see a Big One, a strange one of his kind. I can't see his muzzle because he holds big, earthy-colored heavy…whatever, with food in it. Unless my nose is actually dead, 

there's food in there! 

He seems awfully awkward, trying to open the entrance and struggling with the brown things and one extremely ugly huge leaf 

Big Ones often use to protect their hairless heads from the rain. 

So in an instant, I'm inside. And I'm dry at last. 

I activate my hyper-developed sense of smell and, yes, I'm on the 

right tracks. 

The sniff ends there, in front of a closed wood pane. 

So I wait. 

*** *** 

A nudge in my belly wakes me up. 

Meee. 

Meeeeee. 

The most beautiful sight. 

A Small Cat, barely older than I am. I see fur the color of clouds before rain falls. Deep bright and lustrous and, oh! A male. 

He compliments me about my own fur and the way I smell. Good Cat. 

He dances around me. 

Then, it's happening again. I really should be more careful when I go out. 

Before I can even protest - not that I want to - I'm ready to compete with my Big One and his mate. The Small Cat jumps on my back, his claws dig in my flanks and… Mee. Meow. 

Meow. 

Meeeeeeeeeeee. Meow. 

Meow? Where are you going? Meow? MEEEOOW!!! 

Come back! 

And this idiot flees away. 

Back to square one. It was so sudden and so short, I don't even think it was mating. I mean, My Big One and his female spend hours at this. No, definitely not mating. 

Later. 

"B.T.! How did you get outside?" 

I look up a the Big female. 

"If Mulder were here… I don't even want to go there." 

Then she opens and we go in. Soon enough, the place smells like food. 

*** *** 

It is not a long time before my Big One comes to get me and we go 

on with our…lives. 

Every day, he goes away, then comes back and feeds me. We play, we sleep. Often, the flame-haired female is with him. 

I wasn't yelled at or punished for my little escapade but I never 

got to go outside again. Tough. Squeaky squeak. I miss the outside. 

I feel weirder and weirder as the time passes on. You know, my tummy is achy and my paws are heavy. I sleep all the time - not that I wasn't doing that all the time before anyway - and I eat a 

lot. My Big One often looks at me like I've grown a second tail when I finish my third can of Swimming One food. 

I am so sick. So my Big One shoved me once again in his large moving device and we met a lot of Big Ones in a bright, white place that smells like…some sort of foaming paste Big Ones put on 

their teeth. 

There, a mean Big One put me on my back and started to play with my fur, my paws and all. He didn't play nice. He pressed cold instruments on my belly and it hurt. 

Then I slept. 

*** *** 

I awoke to the angry voice of my Big One. 

"She's PREGNANT, Scully… Danm it!!" 

"She's a cat, Mulder." 

"Rhetorical question. She's gonna have babies." 

What are they bickering about, I wonder. I feel so sleepy. And grouchy. If they keep that up, I am going to have to scratch somebody. 

"A litter, Mulder. Kittens." 

"And who's fault is that? Uh? You told me she behaved!! How could 

you have been this careless?" 

"What are you talking about?" 

There she frowns. I like when she's angry at my Big One because he always seek comfort by rubbing his lower-paws in the fur of my 

belly afterwards. Now, I just want the noise to stop. I flicker my ears. 

"The vet said she was impregnated around the time I asked you to take care of her, Scully. Any idea what could have happened?" 

"I…uh…Immaculate Conception?" 

"Just plain funny, Scully. No wonder Jerry Seinfeld quit his day job!" 

"Ah, ah. Point is, we're dealing with living creatures here. What 

about the kitties? What are you gonna do with them?" 

"I can't keep more animals here and you know it. And I can barely 

raise this little devil there by myself…" 

The female comes closer and pets my back. I purr but I don't like 

that kind of attention anymore. I want her paws away from me. 

"MEOW." 

"She's been terrible for some time now. I can't stand her meowling all day long…" 

Now, I reluctantly, slowly walk to my Big One, only to see their paws entwined above me. I rub myself against his lower-legs. I want HIS attention. Then, I withdraw. I don't even know what I want anymore and my heavy belly hurts like a pulled whisker. 

Whatever is weighing my tummy, get it out!! I can't stand it any longer!!! 

"We'll find a solution when the time comes, okay?" 

"Yeah, but I'm not drowning the little ones…" 

"We could give them out to some kids?" 

"Sure. Poor B.T., how will she understand I had to give away her babies?" 

"She's just a cat, G-man." 

"But she's my cat…" 

I sleep. 

*** *** 

AAARRRGH!! Oh, Holy Mommy of all Small Cats, it rips my body in half!!! 

Strange noises and smells and…stuff are coming out of me. My Big One paces around like a crazed Barking One and so does his female. Their spin makes me dizzy. 

I push and I push and push for what seems to last…you now when the moon is slim and then round and then slim again? Something like that. 

I can feel them jerking and the weight slowly drains ways from me. 

I'm having kitties. I know it. I can feel it. 

Then I see them. Ugly creatures. Their hair is all dirty and wet and their eyes are closed. They don't look at all like the Big One's kitties, or what I saw of them. They aren't smooth and rosy. Great. 

Big Ones gravitate around me but I don't hear them, I only hear every little sound inside my whole body. I guess they are taking care of me and my kittens because soon enough, they start nursing 

and milking me and…Oh, why does this have to be this painful? 

My Big One has water in his eyes. 

I count three Tiny Ones, actively sucking on my nipples to feed their voracious appetite. Yes, I can count. My mom taught me well 

before I…got lost. 

There is this disgusting, repulsive amount of icky matter that came out of me. And I have to eat it. I don't really want to but some kind of unknown and obscure force pushes me to pinch my muzzle and dive in. 

In my frenzy, I hear odd sounds. I look up at my Big One. His face is color of the leaves. His mouth hangs open. 

And suddenly, I realize THE THING. 

I'm a momma. 

FIN 

*** *** 

Any ideas for the kitties? 


End file.
